Future faking is a manipulative behavior often observed in romantic relationships where one person promises a future together or makes grand plans for the future without any intention of following through. The term “future faking” implies that the individual is faking or exaggerating their commitment to create a false sense of security or hope in their partner. Here’s everything you need to know about future faking:
- Definition:
Future faking is a tactic used by some individuals to gain the trust and emotional investment of their romantic partner by making promises about the future. These promises may include plans for marriage, moving in together, having children, or building a life together. However, the person engaging in future faking does not genuinely intend to fulfill these promises. - Characteristics of Future Faking:
Future faking typically involves the following behaviors:
- Making grand promises: The person future faking often makes elaborate and emotionally significant promises about the future, creating a vision of a long-term commitment and partnership.
- Overemphasis on the future: They may focus heavily on discussing future plans and goals, using this as a distraction from addressing current relationship issues or concerns.
- Procrastination and avoidance: Despite making promises, the person may continually postpone or avoid taking concrete steps toward fulfilling them.
- Excuses and deflection: When questioned or confronted about their promises, the person may use excuses or deflect the conversation to avoid accountability.
- Intentions Behind Future Faking:
The person engaging in future faking may have various intentions, including:
- Gaining control and emotional investment: Future faking is a way to create an emotional bond and commitment from their partner without reciprocating the same level of dedication.
- Keeping the partner in the relationship: By offering a promising future, the person hopes to keep their partner invested and willing to tolerate present issues or inconsistencies in the relationship.
- Boosting their ego: Future faking can provide the person with a sense of power and control, as they can manipulate their partner’s emotions and expectations.
- Impact of Future Faking:
Future faking can have several negative effects on the person who is being deceived:
- Emotional manipulation: The promises made through future faking can be emotionally manipulative, leading the partner to invest emotionally and mentally in a future that may never materialize.
- Disappointment and heartbreak: When the promised future fails to materialize, the partner may experience deep disappointment, heartbreak, and a sense of betrayal.
- Loss of trust: Future faking can erode trust in the relationship, as the partner realizes they were misled and their emotions were exploited.
- Wasted time and energy: The partner may have invested significant time and energy in a relationship that was based on false promises and intentions.
- Recognizing and Addressing Future Faking:
Recognizing future faking early on is crucial to protect yourself from emotional harm. Here are some steps to address future faking behavior:
- Observe actions over words: Pay attention to whether the person’s actions align with their promises and commitments.
- Communicate openly: If you suspect future faking in your relationship, express your feelings and concerns honestly and directly.
- Set boundaries: Establish clear boundaries and expectations in the relationship, and be prepared to walk away if the person continues to manipulate and deceive.
Remember, healthy and genuine relationships are built on trust, respect, and open communication. If you find yourself in a relationship with someone who engages in future faking, it may be essential to prioritize your emotional well-being and consider seeking professional guidance or support to navigate the situation and make informed decisions.