Dating Tip #1 SMILE!
The Commandments
Act like a lady
Be gracious, polite, and composed. Use respectful language. No excessive calling, texting, or venting frustrations during the early stages. Men respect women who hold themselves with elegance and poise.
Act like a gentleman
Chivalry is not dead. Open doors, lead with manners, and make her feel safe. No off-color jokes or crude humor too early on. Respect is non-negotiable. Offer Uber if drinks are involved or pay for her valet.
Do not drink too much on the first date
Keep it to two drinks maximum on the first date. Sloppiness will end a connection fast. Present your best self.
Honor thy dating commandments
(Women) Accept dinner if offered. Reducing it to coffee can come off as disinterested or transactional. Avoid checking your phone. Show genuine curiosity even if he’s not your ideal match.
(Men) Always offer dinner. Stand out by arranging transportation and walking her to her car or Uber. Show her she’s being pursued by a man, not a boy.
Don't talk about wanting any/more kids before you are in an intimate committed relationship
One of the biggest mistakes people make is that within the first few dates, is that they start talking about wanting to have kids way too soon, even before they are intimate. And YES there really is such thing as TOO SOON!
No premature baby talk. It creates false assumptions and pressure. Discuss family planning only once in a secure, exclusive relationship.
Don’t be a GOLD DIGGER or a SUGAR DADDY
No Gold Diggers. No Sugar Daddies. (Women) Never hint or ask for financial help. If you're not financially stable, focus on yourself first.
(Men) Don’t brag about who you’ve supported before. When the time is right, and you're exclusive, what you give is your decision.
It is a club rule that flights are to be COACH not Business or First class
Flights must be coach class only . If you are accustomed to flying business or first class, you may upgrade your seat at your own expense.
(Women) If you are not fully comfortable or willing to travel, you must decline the invitation before any booking is made. Once you accept and travel arrangements are confirmed, you are expected to follow through. No-shows or cancellations may result in removal from our service. You are an adult and are fully responsible for your decision to travel.
(Men) Provide her a round-trip coach ticket and a separate hotel room (not a suite). Her comfort and sense of safety are the priority.
BDI facilitates introductions between consenting adults. We are not liable legally, financially, or otherwise for any choices made between parties after the introduction. This includes, but is not limited to, travel, lodging, behavior, or claims of misconduct. If you do not feel comfortable with the arrangement, you should not proceed. Participation is voluntary, and all parties bear their own responsibility.
Be engaging & always SMILE
Respond to his questions with positive energy and enthusiasm, and stay on neutral subjects, like the arts and current events in the beginning. A witty banter is very important. Ask interesting questions, be a good listener, as well as an active participant, and get to know him. Eye contact is important, too – let him look into those baby blues, big browns or gorgeous greens and make sure you look into his. Don’t forget to SMILE
Let the man take the lead and avoid bringing personal baggage to the table
Let the man lead by suggesting a restaurant and making plans for the first date, but let him know in a gracious manner, if you would rather go to another establishment or do something else.
In the beginning, it is best not to bring up any of your deep personal issues; he’s not your therapist (and you’re not his). This often happens with when excessive alcohol and/or lots chemistry. Deep, personal history is simply too much intimate/personal information, for him to process in the very beginning (it is very human to judge when you don’t know someone well enough). If you want to be in a healthy, loving, committed relationship it is important to let the man lead the conversation in the beginning and ask the questions. The conversation should become a ping-pong match, with the gentleman serving and you responding with information about yourself when he asks.
Do not speak of any other romantic relationships on your first couple dates
Men & Women don’t want to hear about their competition just as you don’t want to hear about yours. Focus on the date at hand. men/women want to date someone who is trust worthy, in whom they can confide in. If a gentleman/lady questions you about other relationships on a first date just reply with, “That’s unimportant. What is important is that I’m here with you now.” (don’t forget to SMILE) It’s helpful if you don’t have your ex’s name tattooed on your arm.
Return calls promptly
It’s important to return a gentleman’s call within 24 hours on weekdays, or within 72 hours on weekends or holidays, if you really can’t get away for just a couple minutes, shoot a text and let them know when is a good time to talk. Busy men become perturbed if they don’t hear back from you within that time frame. They will lose interest in you and move on to the next girl, if you do not return their calls in a timely fashion. (Remember the
Always return matchmakers calls or text, if you stop responding you may be removed from our database (or membership may be revoked) this also includes if you don’t reach out of back to your match after you agreed.
(If Interested) Express some Interest
Don’t play hard to get if you like him/her. A man/woman likes genuine compliments just as much as you do (and maybe even more) so don’t be afraid to tell him he’s handsome (or tell her how beautiful she is), interesting or funny. Offering to cook a meal for him is an exceptional, appreciative gesture. If you are not a great cook, order from your favorite take out. But do not offer to outright pay for something: once a woman touches money/credit card in front of a male she becomes masculine energy, which is undesirable for monogamous men, at least the men in our service. Once you are in a committed relationship, and its his birthday, paying for small thoughtful things in his presence is acceptable.
Do not become intimate on the first date
If you’re interested in him/her, a hug and kiss must suffice. We suggest taking it slow and getting to know your perspective mate really well and until you are both monogamous. NEVER assume that you are monogamous, unless he asks you to be monogamous, and is exclusive with just you.
Do not talk about ANY other dating service
If you are a part of any other dating service or dating app, do not bring that up and if you are asked, diffuse the conversation and tell him/her that you cannot talk about that since its part of our terms of service, and you are not to speak or ask about any other services. Or try to play matchmaker with any of our clients.
Don't ask for pictures (Last name or social media) right away
In order to remain in our club you may not ask for pictures or send any pictures before meeting, for privacy reasons, just know that not all of our clients get them. We have different packages for everyone, if somebody gets pushy or asks for them or for your last name during first and second date, you must let us know ASAP. (Through email) That is against Club rules and we will make sure that our Clients and Members/Candidates follow them.
Find out what your top 2 love languages are
We require everyone in the service to find out what their top two love languages are, with our experience it is important not only to know what our top two are, but to also share them with our significant other, it is important for you two to know what each others Love Languages are, to be able to fulfill one another.
5 Love Languages Test
Do NOT drink and drive
Do NOT drink and drive, if you have been drinking you should take an Uber back home (if you are a male we advise that you get your date an Uber home and take one yourself) if she refuses that is her choice to make, as it is your choice to make as well.
You are both adults and you are fully responsible if anything happens.
You may not ask anyone or talk about previous matches
Do NOT talk to your date about ANY previous matches, this also includes you NOT asking your date about any previous matches through our service or any other service. If you guys run out of things to talk about, talk about upcoming trips that you may like to take or have in mind, or this would be a great time to talk about your top 2 Love Languages.If someone starts telling you or asking about it let us know ASAP! We take this very seriously and this is to stay completely confidential.
We have a ZERO tolerance for anyone to body shame any of our ladies
Under NO circumstance may you make a negative comment about a woman’s body, whether you feel like she is fishing for a compliment or you feel that she needs to work on something, or has gained a little weight, or feel as if plastic surgery may help with something. It is completely unacceptable and we have a ZERO tolerance for it, if we find out that you have body shamed, any of our ladies your membership may be revoked.
We have a ZERO tolerance dating preference shaming
You may not try to shame anyone for their dating preferences/styles or make them feel bad about the type that they usually date/or have dated in the past, regardless of physical appearance, age, size, ethnicity, religion, hair color, skin color, sexual orientation, if this doesn't work for you or it makes you feel insecure/uncomfortable, be respectful but there is no need to make anyone feel bad feel judged for what they were/are typically attracted to, as we expect them to be respectful to your preferences as well, this is a safe place for EVERYONE and we stand by it.
Under no circumstance will you contact us after business hours or on weekends
Under NO circumstance may you contact our Matchmakers or anyone from the membership team after business hours. It is extremely important that you respect our teams time off. Our business hours are Monday-Friday between 9:00 A.M. — 6:00 P.M. EST Monday through Friday, except for holidays as we will be closed. Non paying Members/Candidate will be fined between $500 and/or may be removed from our database.
(Women)You may not contact our Matchmakers regarding anything other than Matchmaking, you are to treat our Matchmakers with respect at all times, and please don’t contact them about a potential job that you are looking for, or trying to get an investor for something, unless you have retained us to help with that, you may not ask any of the Matchmakers for any other contacts. You may be fined $500 and your membership may be revoked, you understand that if a matchmaker decides to represent you for free, they are under no circumstances working for you, or your employee, you are to be professional at all times.
You may not act petty or be dramatic
You may not be petty or start un-necessary drama with any of our clients, members, candidates, or matchmakers, we understand that something can seem bigger than it is, in the heat of the moment, but the last thing that we will tolerate is someone who loves drama, gossip or start nonsense, we are all busy and no need for anyone to deal with someone who lacks emotional intelligence, if this happens more than once, your membership may be revoked, this is a place where everyone has to be respectful to each other and their time.
Under no circumstance may you share any of our clients, members/candidates”information
Privacy is very important to us. For this reason, we have created a Non Disclosure policy that describes our collection, and disclosure practices regarding any personal information that we provide to you about clients, members/candidates, or affiliates, by signing below you agree that you will not provide any private information (this includes names, phone numbers, and photos) to anyone, unless you have our written authorization or your membership will be revoked, or we may prosecute you if you violate our confidentiality and it costs us anything.
Breaking our Commandments/being disrespectful or canceling on someone last minute, may get your membership revoked and there will be no refunds
Breaking the club commandments is a HUGE form disrespect not only the other person, but to the service as well. Everybody’s time is valuable regardless of what they do for a living, or how much they make, we consider last minute cancelation, or a no-show extremely disrespectful to the other person and to the service, and it may get your membership revoked and there will be no refunds.
We are extremely protective over our members/candidates (women) & our clients (men) and it is why we have certain club rules that we expect everyone to follow, if we find out that someone is braking our rules, and disrespecting the club or someone from the club, we have the right to revoke their membership.
